stuff going on:

today i got a parking space, finally! its right outside my door, less than hundred feet. its on the same level as my floor, too, so no stairs. i can see it out my window right now...in fact, i could hit it with a paper airplane pretty easily, its about...oh....30 feet away. if i used, you know, a really good paper airplane.

i got the space just in time to be gone for 2 weeks. yaaay.

i only get 2 weeks for christmas break. yaaaay

i have a sizable research presentation to do for class tomorrow. that sucks.

and to cap off the day, i spent 2 full hours on the phone with "kevin" in india. kevin stuggled with the english language, or as he would say, "english is wery hard to...learning." now, everyone who knows me knows im not a racist dude or a xenophobe or anything, so you know it takes a lot for me to be insensitive. but this crosses the line, because when im trying to get techinical support and the guy cant understand me and i cant understand him problems start to arise. i told kev right off the bat that something was physically broken inside my cdrom and that it wouldnt open, not even with the manual open thing. and he proceeded to drag me around my pc for two fucking hours running diagnostics and trying to rerecognize the cdrom and crap. KEV! i yelled repeatedly. LISTEN TO ME. THERE IS SOMETHING PHYSICALLY BROKEN INSIDE MY CDROM. IT WILL NOT OPEN. I NEED A NEW CDROM, AND THEN EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE. and he ignored me and would run the same tests over and over again. he also never believed anything i said. "theres nothing in 'device manager.'" "that is impossible." "well, i'm telling you right now, kev, that nothing is showing up in device manager." "well, lets do it again. RIGHT click, not left, but RIGHT click..." and it just made it all the more enjoyable. about an hour and a half in he said, "put a cd in your drive so that it can try to read the data." I CANT FUCKING PUT ANYTHING IN BECAUSE IT WONT OPEN YOU IDIOT WEVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THIS FOR MORE THAN AN HOUR AND NO, IT DOESNT OPEN, YOUVE ASKED ME THAT A DOZEN TIMES! ITS NOT THAT IT OPENS SLOWLY! ITS NOT THAT IT CLOSES AUTOMATICALLY! ITS NOT THAT IT WONT READ! ITS THAT IT WONT! FUCKING! OPEN! AND I CAN HEAR THE TRAY TRYING TO OPEN BUT IT FAILS! PLEASE SEND ME A NEW ONE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. then he asked how my "christmas planning" was going.

REVIEW
outsourcing customer service
0 Stars (Out of 5)

look, say what you want about outsourcing, but the fact is that customer service involves really nothing else except talking to someone and explaining things. the fact that kevin spoke poor english didnt bother me because he was foreign, it bothered me because it made it absolutely impossible to do the job right. if kevin took an extra year of english, and could have understood me from the beginning, and shaved a full hour and 45 minutes off my call time by doing so, i would have been happy. as it is, however, i'm officially never buying a fucking pc again.

theres a three muskateers bar on my desk right now, and that breaks my heart. why? let me explain:

the three muskateers were three brothers born to queen elizabeth and a black man (or "ethiope" as they called them back then) coincidentily known as okibjwe "michael jordan" boningo. as half blacks (or "oreos" as they called them back then) the three muskateers were treated badly by their mother, who aside from being queen of england was also a horrible racist who had raped their father in a display of dominance. at six the boys were taught how to use swords (or "muskets" as they called them back then) and were forced to fight sickly jews and other undesirables. antonio, the eldest musketeer, killed his first stinking jew at 7 and his first stinking gypsy at 9 and his first stinking woman at 11. by the time the boys were sophomores in highschool they were excellent long-distance marksmen with their swords and their mom, who had since remarried to a white scottish guy named rorie "hakeem olajuwan" mcmanus, said, "hey, kids, time for your final test: kill the guy in this oversized sack and ill make you full fledged musketeers." she pointed at this sack that was tied shut and clearly had a guy in it. you could tell because it was bulky and was rocking side to side on the floor and you could hear screaming coming from it. eager to become musketeers the three boys quickly ran up and started totally stabbing it. after it stopped bleeding (a couple hours later) they opened up the sack and saw that their dad, "michael jordan," was the man in the sack. the reason this story is so sad is that they didnt even feel bad about killing him because their mom had taught them to be racist, too. also, i think they fought in the popes army, or something.

REVIEW
audioscrobbler
5 Stars (Out of 5)

FOREVER! I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER!...not like what i did to friendster, which i really feel bad about.

i was sent to from the future to rock the internet. dont believe me? ask this ninja.


O
IEIII
// \IIIIV
||\VV
IIIIVL
\ /


..ok, i just hit the little preview thing, and it turns out that text ninjas dont look very much like ninjas in the final product. eh, whatever. in the future no one will blame me for failing to make a ninja, because ninjas havent existed in nearly a million years by that point and none of us even know what one looks like.

REVIEW
Folders
3 Stars (Out of 17)

They get the job done, but they cant be used as a sugar substitute. unlike cocaine.

yesterday in class this guy mark, a big, ol' iowa boy, said

hey, who saw the josh groban concert last night?

some girl: i saw some of it. was it good?

mark: it was amazing! german, english...i mean, seriously, if you can sing in like 4 languages, youve got my respect.

now, there are two other guys in the class that are in the bass section of the school choir in this class. and i saw them grimace too when he said this. as anyone whos in chorus knows, this is like saying, "im sorry, any painter who can paint like 4 different colors gets my respect." its that retarded. singing in another language is just a matter of getting the pronunciation down, and you do that most of the time, even when youre singing in english. josh groban is amazing because this dude saw him sing in 4 languages. well, i personally have sung in at least 6 over the last few years, 4 at our concert on saturday alone. so...

im as good a singer as josh groban.


hollaaaaaa

REVIEW
Bono's Sunglasses
1 Star (Out of 5)

i want to still like bono, but these pieces of shit dont make it easy. does he think they make him look young or something? he was way cooler when he just had long hair and a normal, ray-ban free face. jaysus, bahno, who're ya kiddin? wanker.

rest in piece, raccoon. God speed.

dammit, conservatives, you can't have it both ways!

you can't decry the "feminization" of society at the hands of the liberals and still accuse them of being sexist. you can't accuse them of being sexist because they supported madeleine albright and not condoleeza rice. they dont support condoleeza rice because shes not a liberal. yes liberals are idiots in the way they refuse to support anyone but their own, but you do the exact same thing, so shut the fuck up. plus, on top of that, you can't decry them as sexist because they supported albright who seems like a more traditionally feminine woman (case in point: ann coulter's article about how prissy and feminine albright was) because its fucking sexist of you to look down on her for being traditional. and jesus christ, are you the ones always demanding that a woman's place is the home, and all that other crap? we aren't idiots, we've been paying attention. why can't you just stick to your points? why do you have to change your beliefs to better suit political opprotunities? i mean, damn, theres so much of it going on right now, on both sides of the aisle.

ok, now, i know you probably are still trying to sort out that last post. i didnt try to organize it at all, and...yeah, whatever. talk about it if you want.

REVIEW
Futures by Jimmy Eat World
3 Stars (Out of 5)

they basically just remade the last album, i guess. id heard it from my brother, but i didnt believe it until id listened through it a couple times. the second song, though, just tonight, has a guitar solo in it thats all overdriven and visceral...it sounds grotesquely out of place. anyway, give it a listen, its ok.

Thursday, January 22, 2004

ok, fuck the old blog. i have a new one. a real one, one that's easier, more professional, and isn't frequented by delusional jay leno supporters.....at least i hope not. its available through my site, too! thats so wicked metal, i don't even know where to begin. i mean, im doing everything bob is doing, as far as personal websites go, except i didnt have to write a word of html! america: where you can be a moron and still inflate your own ego. oh, also:

Matt: Yeah, well. Pick up harshil’s corpse, and I’ll call Mark. He’s Mexican.

Amit: Ask him if we can borrow some cacti and sombreros for the drive down.

Matt: That’s why im calling.

is it a start?

REVIEW

Mark Prior, Pitcher
1 star (out of 5)

he's got flawless mechanics. he's never done anything wrong, as far as i can tell. he dominates the national league, and hes a little younger than josh beckett. and hes good looking. but hes also a fucking cub. 1 star.