i've been at arizona, usa! i am back in home now, but arizona rocks, because, like, it has warm! lots of it, actually. plus, its pretty, and they have more than 3 kinds of animals there.

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some how i managed to kick my cold's ass.

actually, no, i didn't. the cold is as bad now as it has been since the dawn of time, or whatever.

oh, by the way, i've had a cold for the last week or so.
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here's to hoping that if justin has a kid, it's really indie, so it can be widely hated for being fake and vain.
==================================================

one last thing, i saw another episode of that animal face off thing, and the lion beat the tiger. total fucking bullshit....the tiger is bigger and stronger than the lion! "oh, the lion has more experience fighting." what? who cares? the lion hunts in groups, like a pussy. the tiger is his own man, plus, hes bigger AND stronger! screw you, discovery channel.

REVIEW
http://www.toymania.com/custom/CustomCon10/mattc/mattc.htm
4 Stars (Out of 5)

these are really cool, and the dude did a positively bitchin job on omar rodriguez. he could have done more bands, though, and shouldnt have wasted time doing 2 fucking white stripes ones.

in the new yellowcard video the lead dude looks a lot like john feldmann. also, parts of the song sound like hang ups. except that it has that damn violin.

man i was watching part of that "shark vs. croc" stuff on the discovery channel, and im telling you, talk about an example of the downfall of modern culture. first of all, the show is purely about animals fighting to the death. seemed to me cockfights are, like, looked down on. but when its an elephant goring a rhinos face, its quality entertainment. second of all, THERE IS NO SCIENTIFIC VALUE TO ANY OF THE "EXPERIMENTS" PERFORMED ON THE SHOW! none. whats the point of ramming a huge water container with a metal elephants head? none? well, what if we attached the elephant's head to a TANK? the thing is, this supposedly tells them something about how a rhino would react to being stabbed with a tusk. it says a rhinos body is analagous to a huge plastic jug filled with water. now, this is fucking stupid. but it doenst stop there. the STUPIDEST thing is that they say they gather "information" from the fact that a 200 lb aluminum spike can puncture a water jug and that they input it into "a computer along with biological factors to create our elephant!" what the fuck? im going to make a show about making huge ass robotic animals and then just start destroying random stuff with them, and it will be exactly the same as this show.

oh, i almost forgot... they give all the animals big red lights for eyes.

REVIEW
Boredom
1 Star (Out of 5)

i cant say im a big fan. and i spent 98% of this weekend bored out of my giant robotic metal elephant skull. i cant WAIT to get the hell out of here, hang out with people at home for a little bit, see the wonderful, perfect laura and then go to arizona. and then, of course, resume hanging out and seeing the wonderful, perfect laura. i gotta get the eff outta herrrre.

as if anyone cared about my opinion:

john kerry is making some mistakes.

a. he shouldn't be on the warpath against bush. he should have called bush out on the economy, jobs, taxes, the patriot act and the war while conceeding that the president is well meaning and not a crooked, evil dude. this way he wouldn't come off like an angry bastard. to me, until the democrats started acting like uninformed sum 41 fans, the conservatives were the ones who made ad hominem attacks and portrayed their counterparts as evil. this could have been an opprotunity for the left to come of as firm in their opposition to the president's actions but still reasonable, civil, and compromising. seems to me this would be the best way to appeal to the middle.

b. he should have spent the last 15 years trying to keep a consistent voting record. or at least voted against the war in nov. 2002. or, after voted yes to that, he could have agreed to send the 87 billion in funding over there....i mean, the troops were already there. do you really want to come off as willing to send soldiers to die but unwilling to support them once the dying starts?

c. he should have grown a mustache to appeal to more conservative voters.

for me, the war is interesting. i still believe the war was completely unjustified, but at the same time, im really proud that we have such a kickass military. i wish we had a totally evil race of monsters that we could use the military against all the time. and i wish the evil race had really well developed cities, so we could destroy those. and i wish that despite the fact that each and every one of them was unquesionably evil, they posed no real threat to me. actually, its strange the president is against bio-engineering, because it would probably have benefited him a lot if we could have created this race and had a war against evilmonsteria instead of a normal place like iraq.

i mean, who would have a problem with creating an entire race of intelligent beings purely for the sake of destroying them for entertainment and political gain?

REVIEW
Harshil (Updated Review)
1 Star (Out of 5)

hes a filthy, disgusting, stupid, foul smelling, immoral, jon mau-esque drunk now. also, he said he wished hitler had won ww2 so we wouldnt have so many lazy, shifty minorites ruining the world.

oh, one more thing. i found this retarded quote today...

"i disagree with our president so absolutely. i really fucking hate our president and all the god damn american morons who support him (or support the left for no reason). oh, should i not say that? am i going to be sent to guantanimo bay? fuck you, america."

...on my own blog. february something-or-otherth. beats me why i was so pissed off, or why i was aparently a blindly anti-right dumbass. or why.....well, it was a retarded post.

ah. well, a lot of cool people are on spring break right now. like laura. and just about everyone else i know, aside from matt r. but hes a big huge stupid moron, so its ok. im not on spring break, though. im on "spring." actually, not even that. its, what, the 19th? springs not until the 21st. so i guess im just on "winter."..............wow, that sucks.

at least ill always have lemonade, which aside from being expensive here at cornell college is also unsatisfying and bad tasting. no, no, thats a good thing. because i like to suffer.

im sorry i dont have anything really to talk about, but, hell, its not like youre reading this to be enthralled. youre probably only reading this because i constantly beg you to.

its a real testament to me that im an idiot "scenester" despite having no real "scene" friends at all. and not attending any "scene" parties. and hating 90% of "scene" bands. its a testament mostly to how incredibly fake and stupid i seem, i guess.

the other day it dawned on me that brian rowe has probably been railing against me in his livejournal for months. despite the fact that i harbored no ill will against him and was not responsible for the mistreatment he attributed to me. whatever, i shouldnt even be talking about it. no one wants to hear me drone on about this bullshit in every post.

should i go to that murder mystery theater thing tonight, or should i sulk and go to sleep now, 7:20 on a friday night?

rhetorical question (kind of hard to tell on the internet, where you cant hear the intonation in my heavenly lilt).

REVIEW
Chalk
3 Stars (Out of 5)

Now, normally, 3 stars is my sign of indifference. of course, with chalk, its no fucking exception. who cares about fucking chalk?

wow, well, im not going to argue against that, because brian has admitted that he doesnt know me and that his criticisms are completely false. what can i say, it sucks having a club founded specifically to get people to hate you before you know them....but thats life. Hitler probably had those, too, and he.....well, he didnt turn out that well. but maybe ghandi had clubs created to hate him. and he...um.....made some great tandoori chicken...or at least his wife did.....or so the legend goes....

anyways, im not going to bother brian anymore about all of it. although, brian, if you read this, some points:

a. the whole mistreatment on your livejournal in january....i didn't start it. it wasn't about laura at all. and, although i admit that that made me dislike you, i didnt have a grudge or a problem with you. again, i didnt start it. and i made 4 posts, total, i think, all of them trying to change the focus by mocking conservatives or making points like this:

"let's just all agree, that brian's not always a great guy, and hes made a lot of enemies in this way. thats no reason to assault the poor guy.

...but then again, he dismissed the comments as coming from "assholes" and acted like he had put them back in their place.

so i guess my point is, if you just dismiss every moronic, childish insult you receive instead of lowering yourself to the challenge and hurling slurs, what sort of man are you?

not an awesome one, i tell you what. not even close."

if the last two paragraphs appear to be sarcastic in an attempt at humor, its because it was. and for me to take all blame for a wave of attacks that i didnt start, and not any of the other people, is kind of low.

b. man, im not going to pick apart your hate club, although it was riddled with baseless claims and spelling errors ("arguement" used repeatedly? try not to criticize my spelling). its just that this was easily the meanest thing ive ever experienced. especially since if you had asked me you would have found out that i had no real problem with you (actually, i believe i TOLD that to you back in january), and in fact, i hadn't led the charge to attack you then, and i hadn't done anything to you since.

the stuff you experienced in january was almost exclusively about gothness, and it was all information presented to make fun of you, not to be taken as fact (like calling someone a retard, when they arent retarded. or, as you seem to prefer, calling someone "fag ass" when they arent actually the ass of a gay man). you tastefully decided instead to make it personal and attack my character.

as far as jack marin, that all stemmed from a misunderstanding, because i didnt realize that he had deleted ALL of the responses, not just mine. it hadnt been a jab at me, as i had thought. i should have admitted this in my blog and apologized to jack....but i didnt. it was a mistake.

i cant imagine why my argument with a guy ive been told you dont even hang out with, prompted you to launch a blindingly mean spirited attack. but i thought it was over and hope it is now.

oh, and by the way, you misused the word "biased".

leave me alone.

This is the first entry, and i am using it to make my arguements against the person the fan club is based around, Jamie Ferguson. Jamie is a former student of Maine West High School, but graduated last year. The most i hear of him now is his common searches around other people's livejournals. This is why i made a live journal dedicated to fully bashing and retaliating against him. The main reasons i did this were because i couldn't simply respond to his posts, as he's using a blog and those don't have places for comments, and i also did it for the humor and entertainment of recieving comments from jamie and his supporters and also my own supporters.

Ok, now i'm going to retaliate to each entry he gave about my good freind Jack Marin. Upon looking in his profile and finding a website labeled
"www.jackmarinisahippocritemoron.cjb.net" i immediately clicked and read about what he could possibly have to say about him. I have never read such stupid things before.

First of all, you should all check Jamie's blog, then come back to this. I've put the website in the profile of this username. In Jamie's March 8th entry, i have a few problems. One, Jamie has never met Jack. Normally, i accept that there are people in this world who don't like a certain type of person even though they don't know every person in that sort of group. However, this does not give anyone the right to immediately bash everything about the person. Second, Jamie is going off a political rant Jack made in his livejournal. I don't get involved in politics, so if you want to leave a comment about the political side of this, please feel free. Third, Jamie complains that Jack deleted the comments he left in the livejournal. My thought about this is that Jamie should understand that people may not really want arguing points in their comments, necessarily. Also, Jamie, once again, has an online journal where you cannot leave comments. Biased? i beleive so. If Jamie really wanted to have arguements about things with people, he would have gotten a livejournal like other people. More on that topic later. Fourth, Jamie comments about Jack putting a quote by a band called Refused in his postscript place, Refused being a band which conflicts with Jack's personal political beleifs. My thoughts, Jack has every right to use a lyric he likes, and also has the right to like music for more than just lyrics. Because you know nothing about Jack aside from his livejournal entries, you should have no right to jump to conclusions about why it's in his postscript. Besides, Jamie, you should know by now that quotes don't make a person by any means. They are quotes, and have different meanings to different people. Lastly, Jamie then begins bragging about telling Jack off, and then proceeds to call Jack an asshole. Jamie, don't brag. You come off like more of an asshole in the entry than Jack does.

Moving on to Jamie's next entry, March 10th (updated daily, eh?), he starts by gloating and stating that he started an uproar in his old high school. Let me start by saying i am freinds with many a college kid. Since they graduated, i've never heard them really care about what's going on back at their old high school as much as Jamie has. They've grown up, moved on, dumped their baggage left over from senior year and started over. Jamie, you, too, must grow up. You need to get more of a life than starting an "uproar" (it was about 5 people, by my count) at a place most people would be glad to be out of. You're 19, you're in college, and yet you've nothing better to do than deal with people you don't know back at Maine West. We don't find it insulting, we find it pitiful. Moving on, he says livejournals "really suck. all they do is promote melodrama, fights, self obsession and moronocity. screw that." My comments about this start with the sheer fact that Jamie had nothing better to do than to start a fight with Jack by commenting in his livejournal. then there's the fact that Jamie has a blog, where no one can comment on his entries. It seems quite more melodramatic to completely ignore other comments than to acknowledge them. I choose not to comment about Laura in this, as my problem here is not with Laura, whom i find to be a respectable person.

The next entry is that of March 12th. This was the last entry, but it had also calmed down a little by this point, and the entry didn't piss me off as much as the other two. Jamie says that he's excited teenage scene kids hate him. Once again, Jamie, grow up. In college, there is a hell of a lot more to get excited by. Jamie get's so excited that he's done this, that he proceeds to say he's as "indie" as can be without being a scene kid. Sorry, bud, but i know you well enough to say you're very indie scene. Then he makes the wierd comment about the pop punk to screamo change. I figured this was talking about Jack's band October Fall, but i wasn't sure. I hate to argue about music, but the whole little sentence didn't really give me enough background to what Jamie was getting at. All i can say is that there's more to worry about than bands you don't listen to. You've got your's, other people have their's. Deal.

In conclusion, you made some terrible arguements that i don't agree with, that made me feel compelled to argue with you. Jack is an asshole to some people, some times, and i usually don't associate myself with those people, but as Jack has done nothing asshole-y to me, i don't care how he treats people i'm not freinds with. I stick up for friends, no matter who. Also, Jamie, it's hypocrite, not hippocrite, and enormous, not enourmous. I hope both of those, in fact, ALL of the entries, were done with deliberate sarcasm.

Welcome to the club, everyone. Now, as for comments, i will be checking them often, and i will delete anything i deem not an arguement. That inncludes jokes, things that do not retaliate to the entries either here or in Jamie's blog, and bald comments insulting me and/or jamie. As much i would like everyone to leave a name or something identifying, i won't delete those with no identifying qualities.

and add this journal's site to your profile or webpage!

blogging can be a pain in the ass because you have to write and stuff. Usually, about once a day, ill think of some hilarious thing to blog about, but by the time i get to the computer ive always forgotten. either that, or i just decide that its more important to just sit there and do nothing than waste five minutes writing a blog entry about how i saw a total loser at a show or whatever.

man im kinda tired.

i have to pick between buying an ipod and a digital camera this summer. the ipod would be fun, and the camera would really just serve to boost my own ego and sense of self importance......

so ill probably go with the camera.

REVIEW
2 Brothers Who Want to Get Adopted Together
5 Stars (Out of 5)

sniff...god bless you, brothers. god bless and god speed.

good news everybody!

loser teenage scenesters hate me!

seems like i finally made a name for myself. i always thought it would be a shocking murder, or stealing a lottery ticket from a dead irish dude, but this is pretty sweet, too. speaking as someone who is about as "indie" you can get without becoming a scene kid.....yaaay!

what would have been a teenage pop-punk group 3 years ago now wears black and screams. they call it hardcore/screamo. i liked it better when your songs were happy, kids.

REVIEW
Hackass
4 Stars (Out of 5)

it's a word i made up on accident. how sweet is that? hack is an insult...so is jackass....voila! a violently bitchin insult, created by yours truly (with help from serendipity)!

ugh, my stomach kills. i guess thats what happens when you.....

START AN UPROAR AT YOUR OLD HIGH SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah, i guess that www.jackmarinisahippocritemoron.cjb.net thing caught on. i thought i was damn near brilliant in my refused based break down of his lj. damn near laser sharp. sharp lasers.

also, livejournals really suck. all they do is promote melodrama, fights, self obsession and moronocity. screw that.

furthermore, laura agrees that i am really smart.

.drawkcab ti etorw i yhw em ksa t'noD .sseug i ,teews ytterp s'tI

(5 fo tuO) sratS 3
reggloB
WEIVER

well, everyone who knows jack marin, heed my advice:

hes a fucking moron and an enourmous asshole.

now, i dont know the guy, but he made lj post about how liberals are assholes. i read this, disagreed, and made an educated, civil reply that was mostly about how we should combat partisan sentiments not with more partisant sentiment but with compromise and civility.

he deleted the message. without reading it, even, im told. so i sent another one. this one cursed a lot more.

and he deleted this one, too. so finally i noticed that this guy used a refused quote on his page. repeatedly. "we dance to all the wrong songs," it said. thinking fast, i made one final post:


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hey, i love the refused quote that you use for the post reply thing

"we dance to all the wrong songs."

yeah, heres another refused quote:

"We will continue to, at every attempt, overthrow the class system, burn museums and to strangle the great lie that we call culture. We will continue with new projects and forces to do everything that is in our power to overthrow the capitalist structure that alienates us from every aspect of life and living, smash the reification that forces us to dress in outdated identities and rules: we will continue to demand revolution here and now."

i find that one really interesting. do you not care about lyrics and meaning? are they not important? libs are assholes because they insult the president...refused calls for the bloody overthrow of capitalists and their conservative supporters (aka you.) and dont try to tell me you listen to them because you like hearing a political opinion different from your own, because you deleted all the posts that disagreed with you, you god damn hippocrite.
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ah. nothing makes me happier than people who pretend to care about art but actually ignore the meaning behind the art that gives it value.

....wait, no, that doesn't make me happy. telling those fuckers OFF is what makes me happy.

so fuck this kid, this kid i dont even know. hes an asshole.

REVIEW
"The Shape of Punk to Come: A Chemerical Bombination in 12 Bursts" by Refused
5 Stars (Out of 5)

great album. one of my 3 favorite all time, in fact. even better, its all about the violent overthrow of the capitalist elite. yaaaaay

i gave up on my diet. i was feeling kind of depressed for whatever reason (im worthless) so i decided that the jig was up on getting in shape, and it was time to eat chocolate and drink dr pepper. ill still work out, so im still gonna be an inspiration to the kids, but the diet is as dead as rick moranis' career. hee hee ho ho hoo hoo

REVIEW
Orchesis
5 Stars (Out of 5)

it was really sweet. i even went twice! and it had nothing to do with laura asking me to go twice. im sorry, all, too, but lauras dance was the best. (notice that however biased, this was an ACTUAL review!)

im on a diet. there are a couple obstacles to overcome:

i love food, its fun and delicious, and i hate being hungry

i eat when im bored, and im bored constantly.

my room is filled with good tasting (aka bad for you) foods

this means i have to eat fucking salads.

ok, thats a lot to overcome, i know, but i'm fat. and i want to not be. and im sure that ill have heart disease soon if i keep living the way i do. i know that ill have to exercise....but ill do it! at least at first. um.................................................................................................................................

you gonna die. someone'll kill ya. someone'll stab ya, with a knife.

REVIEW
The Past
3 Stars (Out of 5)

well, its not quite the present, is it? no, nor is it the future. nope. not the future. not the present, either. one thing's for sure, though.

like a warlord (9:08:52 PM): i think ill write a blog today about how as soon as you say the words "permanent teeth" youre a whine moron
like a warlord (9:09:06 PM): whine = whiney
MichaelJordan23 (9:09:13 PM): hahahahahahaaha
like a warlord (9:10:20 PM): know what i mean?
like a warlord (9:10:25 PM): like, as soon as someone says
like a warlord (9:10:49 PM): "the car came to a sudden stop, and it chipped one of my sons PERMANENT TEEEEEEEETH!!!!!!"
like a warlord (9:10:56 PM): you know theyre a whiney moron
MichaelJordan23 (9:11:04 PM): hahahahaha
MichaelJordan23 (9:11:06 PM): yeah
MichaelJordan23 (9:11:12 PM): totally see what you mean
like a warlord (9:11:17 PM): a tooth is a fucking tooth
like a warlord (9:11:23 PM): its not like it snapped his spine
MichaelJordan23(9:11:45 PM): his permanent spine!
MichaelJordan23(9:11:49 PM): hahahahahahaaha
like a warlord (9:11:49 PM): hahaha
like a warlord (9:12:03 PM): OW! YOU BROKE ON EOF MY PERMANENT RIBS!
like a warlord (9:12:23 PM): IM CALLING MY DAD! HES A LAWYER!
MichaelJordan23 (9:12:32 PM): hahahahahaha
like a warlord (9:12:47 PM): judge: now you say he chipped your tooth with a brick?
like a warlord (9:12:58 PM): kid: my PERMANENT tooth, your honor.
MichaelJordan23 (9:13:21 PM): hahahahhhaha
like a warlord (9:13:25 PM): judge: gasp! my god. I move to skip the trial and sentence the defendent to death.
MichaelJordan23 (9:14:01 PM): hahahahaahahaha
like a warlord (9:14:15 PM): judge: you are truley the worst kind of scum, billy wiggins. may god have mercy on your tooth chipping soul.

aim is is weird for me. especially having the blog and all. because, like, once something has been written, why the hell would i want to write it again? huh?

REVIEW
Justin's New "Band" W/ Harshil
0 Stars (Out of 5)

harshil says hes in a band with the tremendous j, justin. justins a great guy, but harshil's a non-musician who admits himself hes not really into music. again, justin, i love ya, but youre off your rocker on this one. harshil's ugly, and stupid, and brown, and a horrible musician. oh, and harshil, go to hell. you bastard. that i hate. more than life itself. (i hate life so much)

ok, ive had enough of this william hung crap.

was it fun to watch him crash and burn on national tv?

of course.

that doesn't mean we have to treat him like hes a legitimate performer.

look, the guy is a horrible singer. horrible! he doesn't do one thing right. on top of it, he's ugly (look at those teeth), hes a terrible dancer, hes ethnic (let's face it, this isn't a population that takes kindly to a thick foreign accent) and he's utterly, utterly naiive. this passes for charm nowadays?

they gave the guy a record contract! and hes appeared on numerous tv shows to sing. The guy is horrible! and all this attention has lead him to believe that he's NOT horrible, and people actually enjoy hearing him sing! it's gonna break the poor fucker's heart when he fades from the public concience in a month.

....unless his record is a hit, he gets a movie deal, and remains a celebrity for years to come. If this happens, please send five dollars and a photograph to

The Jamie Ferguson "Make a Rocket and Leave Earth Forever and/or Commit Mass Suicide" Society
Box 514, 910 Commons Circle
Mt. Vernon, IA 52314

REVIEW
The Cleaning Crew in My Dorm
0 Stars (Out of 5)

what the fuck?! i left my bowl out by the sink to SOAK!!! i wasnt THROWING IT AWAY! it clearly wasn't a derelect bowl, it had only been out there for an hour! go to hell, you stupid cleaning crew. go to hell.