ever notice how whenever youre sick and have to miss class, but its not a horribly bad thing because the sox games on espn, and you can watch that, the sox always lose while only getting three hits? why the hell is it ALWAYS like that?

(and yes, matt, i fucking told that story before, but just to you.)

i hate school. i hate it a lot. i want it to be over now. and maybe, if im lucky, someone will read this. and call me obsessed with highschool, which i also hated, and make a club about it. fuck you, phillips. your headphones break too easily.

look, im sorry im so pissed right now, but life is really stressful and bad right now, and its kind of funny when im pissed. or thats what my therapist tells me!

(no rimshot, because the drummer couldnt tell it was supposed to be a joke, as it utilizes no humor)

ugh. and yes, matt, i did tell a joke earlier today about my therapist. it went like this:

me: well, doc, the thing is that everyone i know, even my friends, make fun of me behind my back because i always tell the same stories over and over again.

therapist: well, seems to me the problem is paranoia.

me: no, seriously. theyve admitted to it.

therapist: well, i suggest you get a good brand name piece of rope from the hardware store.

me: what? why?

therapist: suicide's creepier when its a hanging.

(drummer recognizes the punchline and delivers the rimshot)

oh, and heres a little disclaimer: i'm NOT suicidal, i'm NOT seeing a therapist and that joke is NOT funny.

REVIEW
the new technology that lets you kill people instantly and you never get in trouble, and not even God considers it immoral behavior
5 Stars (Out of 5)

man, this stuff rocks! oh, wait, it doesnt exist, and never will. thats a shame. i also wish i hadn't paid 30 bucks to saddam huessein for it...




-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oh, and one last thing. if i spelled "immoral" or "huessein" or some other word wrong, dont forget to go to hell.